When I ask you to listen to me and you start giving me advice,
you have not done what I asked.
When I ask you to listen and you begin to tell me why I shouldn’t feel that way, you are trampling on my feelings.
When I ask you to listen to me and you feel you have to do something to solve my problem, you have failed me, strange as that may seem.
Listen: All I ask is that you listen, not talk or do – just hear me.
When you do something for me that I can and need to do for myself,
you contribute to my fear and inadequacy.
But when you accept as a simple fact that I do feel what I feel, no matter how irrational, then I can quit trying to convince you and get about this business of understanding what’s behind these feelings.
So, please listen and just hear me.
And, if you want to talk, wait a minute for your turn and I’ll listen to you.
*Author unknown*